I'm a terrible blogger, and haven't updated this in months. So quick run down on whats happened since March!
- I started dating Bert, he is the most amazing person i have in my life.
- I graduated high school.
- I moved back in with my parents and am making amends.
- I kind of lost my job. Well, have to transfer stores (so I'm currently not working)
- And a secret i would appreciate my real life friends to keep,please,(and not mention it on face book, unless in a private message), i got pregnant and am in the process of miscarrying it.
The only reason I'm bringing up the last point, is because i need somewhere to share the story in hopes of getting over it.
I found out i was pregnant by a home pregnancy test in September. Surprised and scared, i refused to believe it. Well, 3 home pregnancy tests and an 80 dollar urgent care visit later, it was confirmed.
I was starting to accept it, prepare myself for it, and get excited for it! When i started to have some slight bleeding. 2 days later, September 30th it became heavy and me and Bert went to the ER.
10 hours later, and 3k later, all they could tell me is i could be having a threatened miscarriage. Which basically means they have no idea and my pregnancy could go either way. Also i found out i was 5 weeks along, which is one week before they can see a heartbeat, and that i found out i was pregnant at only 3 weeks along.
After this i had an appointment at the free clinic in town, and after they saw all my paper work sent me down to labs to get my hormone levels tested, If they went significantly up, it would be a good sign, and down would be a bad sign. Before sending me home they told me to call back in 24 hours for my results.
At this point i was already scared and wondering, and unfortunately i didn't get any of the answers i hoped to get. I called back at the 24 hour mark, and the rude woman who answered said that i might have to wait up to 72 hours for my results. They called the next morning and left a voice mail telling me my levels went up slightly, and that they wanted me to come back in a couple of days to get tested again.
And after that time again. Both times my levels went up, but not as much as they hoped. This past Tuesday i finally had an appointment with the clinic, and the women there sounded very hopefully that my pregnancy was continuing since my bleeding had slowed down. (Oh, on a backtrack after the ER visit i bleed for 2 weeks, stopped for 1, then continued bleeding lightly again). I had more blood testing down Tuesday and am waiting for a result still. They also scheduled me for an ultrasound that took place Wednesday.
Tuesday night is when everything went downhill. i started passing clots and having severe cramping and bleeding, worse then anything Ive ever experienced. Wednesday it continued till the evening. Having an ultrasound when having cramps like that was the worst thing i could imagine. I hope none of you ever have to go through any of this..
So now its early Friday morning, still bleeding and cramping(but not nearly as bad), waiting for answers, and emotionally exhausted.
That's my story with everything going on, and i believe I've hit my rock bottom.
p.s please excuse any grammatical errors and sentence structure, its been awhile. p.p.s
If i hear that any of you have told anyone, or if this ends up on face book and getting out, I'm sorry but that's violating our friendship and i will never forgive you, and do not and will not continue a friendship with you
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